Surprise friendship opens doors to a new culture

by Jenna Sellers

I remember being on the opposite side of the world. I can smell the city air and feel the bitter cold. I can see the commotion and chaos on the streets. I can feel the brush of strangers rushing into buildings and hear the shouts of vendors desperately trying to attract my attention.

I am delivered back to the moment I met Lily.

The first friend I made in Shenyang, China, Lily knew enough English to enable the two of us to communicate. She offered to take me shopping on her favorite street; I gladly accepted. 

More than a trinket from China

Bargaining with the vendors to ensure the best deals. She was completely in her element. Out of a sea of choices she helped me select a watch. The faux leather hugged my wrist and the crystal cover reflected light in various directions. When I look down at my wrist, I am instantly reminded of Lily.

One of the most beautiful aspects of many of the Chinese people is that they do not hesitate to show affection towards friends and family. It is perfectly normal to see two young Chinese women walking hand-in-hand down the street. Cultural distinctions such as this left me, a child of the American South, speechless.

I will never forget the night I ran through crowded streets hand-in-hand with Lily. I looked down at my watch as we rushed against time across the city. Feet occupied every inch of the walkway. Bundled bodies shuffled around corners and across streets. Even with thick mittens and Lily’s warm hand around mine, my fingertips tingled in the negative 25-degree temperature. Not even the falling snow could distract me from Lily’s sweet words, freely expressed.

“I cannot believe that we are friends,” she said, “I… love… you. I love you!”

If only time could have paused in that precious moment.

My friendship with Lily began because of a watch. Our relationship deepened because of our time together. She told me she had recently experienced a radical change in her life; she had accepted Jesus Christ as her Lord and Savior. Lily called herself a Christian for the first time two weeks before we met. She craved to know more. I had the opportunity to explain how I sensed the Holy Spirit on a daily basis.

During one of our conversations, Lily said, “I have something wrong in my mind.” I wasn’t sure what she meant, so I asked her more about it. “I do not know what it is called in English, but I have fears and bad thoughts,” she explained. To this day I do not know exactly what she suffers, but I know she learned that she doesn’t have to be afraid of God.  

Crossing the divide

On the second to last night of my stay in China, I hosted a dinner party for all of my new Chinese friends. I did not want to leave their country without sharing a piece of my culture with them.  I knew homemade, American-style pizza was the perfect meal.

I did not have the luxury of purchasing pre-made crust, pizza sauce and shredded cheese. The success of the party relied on my watch; its guidance helped me efficiently budget time. The morning before the party consisted of kneading dough, chopping vegetables and preparing sausage. I cooked six pizzas in one small toaster oven. I paid close attention to my watch so the pizzas wouldn’t burn. I looked down to check the time at the sound of the first knocks on the door. 

Lily arrived 30 minutes before the official start of the party. She eagerly watched over my shoulder as I pulled each pizza out of the oven. The joy I felt as I watched Lily and 14 other Chinese students experience their first bites of pizza did not compare to their excitement.

When I said, “Hey guys, you don’t need to use chopsticks to eat this,” their facial expressions resembled those of deer in headlights. Many of my favorite memories from the trip were made that night.

My time in China was short, but I left with many souvenirs and gifts. The watch remained my favorite. The watch became an essential component to my wardrobe the day I purchased it. I adjusted my routine to include the brief moment necessary to fasten it tightly and lock the buckle. The silver accents and dark brown strap fit right in with my usual silver rings and pearl earrings, and it somehow made me feel complete. 

I felt close to Lily when I was close to the watch. Appreciating its simple beauty, I wore the watch every day, as a reminder of my time in China. At least that was my plan. Within my first week back at Berry, as I walked across the stones within the Ford complex, a screw came loose on my watch. I did not have time to catch the watch before it fell to the hard ground. The crystal cover shattered across the stones; the hands stopped ticking. 

I expected grief, but I was surprisingly overcome with peace. My memories exist with or without the watch on my wrist. My watch now sits on my desk, a monument to what is truly important in life.